1. Chapter 1 (1/2)

this is a series of clary/mattes drabbles, written for goldenlake's 2011 smackdown. since they're all related, i've decided not to give them each their own chapter. instead, they'll be grouped with 10 drabbles per chapter to make it easier to read.

check out my profile for more about goldenlake, and also the king's own, where i'll have more clary/mattes drabbles from smackdown (it's too complicated to upload them all here).

…

"what is it, clary?" mattes pulled himself upright. "you've looked troubled ever since you walked back in. what happened in port caynn?"

she nibbled at her nail, something she usually scolded him for doing. "nothing turned out like it was supposed to. and they said it was for the best, but…i don't' know what to do. it's messy."

"but you're alright, aren't you?" mattes asked, worried. "except for your ear, but that's not so bad." he reached over and took her hand in his. "tell me, clary. you know i'll do whatever i can to help you, i swear it."

she let out a cynical bark of laughter. "i wouldn't swear anything until you know what you're swearing."

"well if you just told me-"

"mattes, i'm the rogue of port caynn."

…

"you're the rogue?" mattes echoed, his voice full of shock and disbelief. "of port caynn?" he watched clary nod glumly. "how did that happen?"

"i'm not sure i know myself," she said wryly. "but port caynn couldn't be left without a rogue, and the higher-ups decided that they couldn't trust anybody already in the rogue there until they could be sure that they weren't involved with pearl's plans. and then they decided that they'd make me the rogue, and the people of the rogue didn't really complain but i don't know if that's because they like me for some reason, or if they think it'll be all too easy to stick a sarden knife in my back because their last rogue, pox rot her, managed to take a sarden chunk out of my ear, and –"

"clary. calm down, love." mattes rubbed her hand gently. "everything will work out, i promise."

…

"you can't just promise that everything will work out," clary snapped. "i didn't ask to be the rogue but i am, and i don't even want to go back to sarden, stinking port caynn. nothing good for me has ever come from that pox-ridden place. and what am i supposed to tell tom?" she drew in a deep, shuddery

eath. "i told him when i left that i'd be safe and it was just another hunt, and now i'm the sarden rogue and i'll have to go off and leave him and leave the dogs and –"

mattes smiled at her as he interrupted. "i can promise that you won't have to leave me."

…

mattes had watched as his partner slowly grew more and more hysterical. he was fairly certain that she'd put up a tough front for the trip home (mostly by stubbornly refusing to let herself think about it), and waited until she was behind closed doors in his rooms before she fell apart.

he decided it was safe enough to tug her onto him and wrap his arms around her. "i've always wanted to go to port caynn," he murmured. he felt her tense up as she realised what he was saying.

"mattes, you can't…this isn't your mess."

he just grinned into her hair. "there's always been a little part of me that wanted to be the rogue."

…

mattes grinned at his partner. "there's always been a little part of me that's wanted to be the rogue."

clary goodwin, the reluctant rogue of port caynn, stared at him for a moment. "i always knew your nob was cracked," she said finally.

"mayhap so, but you're glad of it now, right?"

clary stayed silent while she thought. "you can't, mattes." she looked him in the eye, her face serious. "it's not that i don't want you to help me sort it all out, but it's my mess. i can't let you throw your life away too by being caught up with the rogue."

mattes just grinned at her. "you don't think you're going to get rid of me that easily, do you?"

…

"i mean it, clary." mattes squeezed her hand tightly between both of his. "no matter what happens, you can count on me to be right there beside you through all of it. we're partners, right?" he waited for a small smile to begin to grow. "you're never going to be able to get rid of me."

clary's smile turned into a grin, one that reached her eyes. "what if i want to get rid of you?"