1. Chapter 1 (1/2)

risk

exposure to the chance of injury or loss; a hazard or dangerous chance

i knew it the second i wrote down the words that i was taking a huge risk. the words were meaningless if any one else said them, but structured and presented to the world through my mouth could lead to dangerous and ultimately disastrous consequences. the sentence i'd written when i heard the news was exactly that, a ticking time bomb. but it was the truth, it was how i felt, raw emotion that i had to release in the only form i could. through lyrics, the only tie we still seemed to have left.

i don't want to hear the wedding bells.

months later the sentence had become a chorus, more words were strung together to form what would become a song. a complete risk.

to perform it? well that had taken serious balls. i hadn't even wanted to record it honestly, but late one night as the band discussed the album and which songs would be included i couldn't help but dwell on the song wondering what would happen if i showed it to everyone. i read the lyrics many times and i knew it was the only way i could make her see. i needed to make her see i was unhappy. was it wrong to force this on her? maybe? but through lyrics we communicated, through spoken words we got no where, we hadn't said anything worth while in a very long time apart from pleasantries which were far beyond fake.

i wanted to make her talk, to make her angry and see the truth.

it was risk but i'd take the chance knowing well the consequences i faced.

so i sung wedding bells.

i sung it to everyone.

"one minute..."

i looked up at joe who was staring at me lounged across my sofa his eyes shifting to the clock. i followed his gaze seeing the time...

2.59am

her habit of calling at midnight where ever she was in the world became somewhat of annoyance with time differences yet i could depend on it.

that was something that miley had never changed.

i'd prepared myself for this minute, ever since we confirmed the set list for the show. i'd planned what i'd say to her, how i'd act but i knew the moment she did call that would all change. miley had that affect over me, a way to quickly destroy my plans and my direction in a second by saying the smallest things. it's not that her words were thought out or constructed, it was the way she said them. i could tell the difference now, i spoke to two different miley's since we

oke up, the first was the one who had to be conservative and pleasant, the other was

utal and honest; i knew already the one i'd face tonight.

"what if she doesn't call?" joe asked slowly.

i watched the clock not shifting my eyes from it, fifteen seconds to go.

"she will."

"nick you may have gone too far this time-"

"i could never go too far, she may hate me but she'll call to tell me as much. silence isn't something miley does well she always wants to put her two cents in."

"i think it'll be more than two cents..."

"i took the risk understanding the consequences joe."

five. four. three. two. one.

silence. deadly silence.

my eyes stared at the phone and waited, for it to blare, for the sound of my impending doom.

yet it didn't come.

"12.01..." joe whispered quietly, "i guess she's

oken the last tie you guys still had-"

not a second later the phone started ringing. my eyes looked at the screen just to make sure as i quickly closed them a little scared of the name that appeared,

"or not," joe finished dismally, "i'll give you some privacy, good luck nick."

he left the room as i picked up my phone, it's weight suddenly feeling like far more of a burden than normal. i had to answer though, because i'd taken the risk and as selfish as i'd been i wouldn't just keep silent, like miley i wanted to put my two cents in, even if it was the last few coins i had left. i pressed accept and moved it to my ear,

"you promised." she whispered.

two simple words that could have meant nothing but held so much just by adding a particular tone. however it wasn't the tone i'd expected, nor was the small intake of air miley made as she attempted to mask what i knew was a sob. miley wasn't angry, mad, screaming or yelling like she had so many times before. this time she was upset, crying, something i hadn't expected, something i hadn't planned for. so like that i was off the tracks, the plans gone in a second.

"i never said i'd keep it miley." i responded truthfully, "you just assumed i wouldn't write a song,"

"i told you to keep it a secret, that-"

"i did, i didn't tell the press about your engagement, i didn't say anything i kept my word-"

"you lied to me!" she yelled her voice shaking, "your reaction, you faked it to me, you...you said you were happy for me."

i said nothing in response, instead listening to her quickly hastening

eaths because she was right, i had lied to her.

"you caught me off guard i lied because-"

"what? you didn't want to hurt me?" she whispered quietly through the speaker, "but then you go and write a song about me, my fiance, our upcoming wedding..."

"i couldn't tell you i was unhappy miley."

"you just did! through a three minute song that you sung to the world!" she hissed hurt,

"i-"

"are selfish," miley suddenly interrupted, letting out a sob, "and you have no idea the repercussions you create when you do something like that! we had our battle nick, i thought that was over, i thought we were okay, that i could trust you again. you mislead me, you lied to my face and you turned around and did something so stupid and reckless that i don't think you can even understand the consequences."

"miley it's just a song," i felt myself retort,

"that potentially just ruined my engagement."

"oh for god's sake miley you're blowing this-"

then she started actually sobbing and i stooped realizing the word potentially might have been misinterpreted.

"wait? liam he-"

"didn't know..." she yelled at me through sobs, "that i told you we were engaged before the official announcement."

i snapped my mouth closed feeling the

utal impact of the consequences, listening to the girl i loved cry because of me, because of something i'd done to try and prove to her that it was meant to me she walked down the aisle to.

"i didn't know that!"