33. Chapter 33 (1/2)

i was shocked when i realized how short this chapter would be. i actually make it a point to have at least 2000 words. i almost made this and chapter 34 on larger chapter, but i decided against it. i am already behind where i want to be in terms of how many chapters i am ahead. i am currently only about two weeks ahead and i don't like that.

you are all so sweet! i appreciate all the words of encouragement. this week is much better. i know many are getting tired of the waiting to see about lizzy and darcy, so i have decided to end the agony and make the pairing official. we are still a few chapters away from a physical meeting, but you won't have to wait too long. this story still has a ways to go.

"what was that?"

"i need you to marry me."

"why?"

"i haven't been honest with you, richard. your father has been trying to help me the last three years and with every avenue we have tried, the same outcome is presented to us."

"anne, what are you…"

"i'm dying."

richard stared at his cousin, his mind denying what she was saying. she wasn't dying. she couldn't be. he realized she was still talking.

"your father and i had devised a plan years ago. mother would not hear of me seeing anyone but that blasted apothecary she favors so much, so your father would seek out a doctor, only the best, then he and your mother would put him up in the local inn and stay here for a visit. my aunt would convince mother to go into the village, and uncle would sneak the doctor in to me. all said the same, and there have been many. my heart is too weak. i do not have much time left."

"we can take you to a warmer climate. isn't that the usual treatment?"

"that might have worked for me ten years ago, but such treatments will, at best, only prolong the inevitable. richard, my strength has been failing me over the last five years. the only reason i have been able to drive in the phaeton is because mother demanded it, and a groom has always had to carry to and from the house. poor mrs. jenkins has had to help bear my physical weight for three years now just to walk across the house. i haven't taken a walk in the gardens in almost five years. for the past three months, i have barely made it to the drawing room."

"there must be something," he tried again. she smiled sadly at him as she shook her head. "why marry me? what do you hope to accomplish?"

"once i accepted that there was nothing more i could do for my health, i began to look towards what i can do. after me, the estate will fall to my father's distant cousin, a sir arthur holloway. he is not a pleasant man. when mother passes after, he will inherit it all. however, if i am married, my husband can inherit."

"why me?"

"darcy has an estate. nathaniel will inherit your family's estate. georgiana is not an option at all, but she has a large fortune in any case. you are one of the best men i know, richard. you have never begrudged anyone your status and you are unwaveringly kind to my mother, whom we all know is trying on a good day. you are fair in all your dealings and you have been running rosings with darcy for years. it would give me so much peace to know that you would be able to find happiness in this life, and you could as the master of rosings park."